Reso-what?

Tis the season for New Year's Resolutions. When it comes to these, I'd call myself a cynic.

Go to the gym three times a week this year? As if.
Read four books a month? Right.
Introduce myself to someone new everyday? Sure.
Cut back on wasting time online? Oh, okay.

I dislike them, I think, because I see failure as inevitable. Weeks will go by when the only physical activity I get is climbing the stairs to the kitchen. Months will go by when the only reading I do is to find out which actors are in the movie I'm watching. I'll go days without saying hello to anyone new, and I'll spend hours staring at a computer screen before I realize I haven't done anything productive. To resolve would be to set myself up for failure.

I also find it difficult to come up with good resolutions. General resolutions are too easy to justify: "My resolution was to spend less time on Facebook, and today I only spent two hours. That's less than three hours!" Specific resolutions are tough to live up to: "I wanted to write thirteen blog posts this month, but I've only done twelve. Guess I'll forget about that one."

I admire people who make resolutions for themselves. They acknowledge the risk of failure, but continue. They dream of bettering themselves, and find specific ways to do so.

I could come up with fail-proof resolutions.
I resolve to accidentally reveal that I am a pessimist. Check!